by remembereringgiap
(lifted from a comment)
one hundred and fifty one
& we were/joined by subversives/in foolish moves/we might have
made a fortune/while discussing milton/with the saints/who swore black
& blue paintings/were sold easily/to wellwishers/who wore waste
& always spoke/from the corners/of their mouths/like elegant gangsters
from forties films/where everyone was/on the take/& went down
nightly to harlem/to get fix/from art pepper/perhaps imitating black
man on other/side of city/sitting in studio/painting pretty picture
before he became/married to museum/of modern art/he was poor
mark rothkowitz/who really wanted/to be scholar/of the torah
reading a chapter/or a verse/in private place/where he’d worship
to whatever god/was left after/city of riga/fell to kingdom/come with all
stories of scherezades/that used to/fill that town/even during pogroms
a dirty joke/was always told/at the bootmakers/to one of/his gentile friends
of whom himmler/once spoke clearly/when he was/speaking of good
jew he said/when planning final/solution he sought/this perfect pedagogue
who preffered chickens/even though vegetarian/like his master
he was once/asked if perhaps/there was good/jews to be/had he thought
one hundred and fifty two
some could be/saved from source/he was silencing/in the east
but he broke/thought & said/that every one/had good jew/that everyone had
their good jew/was our misfortune/he had said/hoping it would
become song/like horst wessel/lieder he learnt/to sing loudly
with his boys/when they were/trampling through snow/somewhere near stalingrad
he could hear/sound of shattering/glass inside shell/of a city
& he knew/it was not/synagogue this time/it was inside/head he held
as austrian intellectual/drifted past him/& vomited behind/a burning tank
where he might/meet an acquaintance/& discuss hofmanstahl
before next shelling/from that city/that was inside/the world’s heart
wherever that was/it has gone/a long time/& this understood
by mr nixon/so recently deceased/on my anniversary/who remade asia
in his own/image he sold/to baptist preachers/when they sought
a room in/the white house/when they had/day to spare/in washington city
after seeing negroes/shoot each other/in the streets/like they had
one hundred and fifty three
been told tellingly/by a boy/from state department/who held degrees
from three european/universities that had/reputation for scholarship
before the storm/most was modest/especially learning language
of the landlords/who you might/have seen in/interludes in opera
that were elaborate/short stories that/they couldn’t sell/to television tycoon
who is now/running modern italy/from an office/decorated by dancers
from some company/perhaps from houston/somewhere in texas
certainly from country/where everyone is/falling over once/inside interior space
wherever that it/you will find/your family feuding/over of argument
you had thought/was over once/you had bribed/teacher who told
you difference between/silver & gold/pride & shame/translating the taboos
you would pay/homage to heroes/who were all/heretics at some
time a larceny/you had learnt/from the best/it is said/by mr baudelaire
oh how weary/i am how/weary i have/been for many/years already of
this need to/live twenty four/hours every day/he had written
to his mother/who sought solace/from corrupt clerics/whom she knew
as good men/go they were/not so bad/after all is/said & done
one hundred and fifty four
knowing her son/would join haunted/who had begun/wandering with winds
through most modern/& civilised cities/that are in/retrospect only ruins
that are no/better than old/ones we read/about after ascension
of all angels/we might have/read about augustine/for example another
who was carrying/note in hand/as he was/going to give/message to messiah
who was about/to confront crowd/with some good/news he couldn’t
sell to anyone/but the boy/who might today/join hamas in/hebron after hell
it is said/after good doctor/came in shooting/with the guns/he had bought
somewhere in brooklyn/it is mentioned/in a report/i’m not reading
because my heart/breaks too often/to read much/more to mention
day to day/events in middle/east or west/north or south/wherever that is
you can take/compass & ruler/that i’m carrying/because i am
not going anywhere/except these memoirs/that are defiling/minutes of past
i do not/want to live/again even anecdotally/at this time/or any other
because i have/witnessed that experiment/& i have/sent back invitations