Moon of Alabama Brecht quote
January 08, 2006


Semenpaddy - I did not find that word in any dictionaries, but it is the rough translation of a German slang expression.

It describes a state of mind and odd behavior young males invariably fall into when they have no release for their natural hormone induced horniness. Usually it unfolds as some crankiness, but it soon evolves into serious aggression.

That was the reasoning behind providing army whorehouses in WW I and II and recreational vacations to Asian hotspots for troops in Vietnam. A military with semenpaddy is aggressive, undisciplined and the soldiers do behave irrational. Any mastersergeant worth his stripes will care for his troops to have some occasions. But now this:

For the first time, the Department of Defense has specifically made it a crime for a servicemember to patronize a prostitute. The punishment: up to a year in prison, forfeiture of pay and dishonorable discharge.

The formal order came in a presidential executive order signed without fanfare Oct. 14, directing changes in the Manual for Courts-Martial.
Stars & Stripes

I grew up in German town with some 4,000 locals plus some 500 GI's whose boring job was to maintain a bunch of nuclear rocket tips stored in the woods nearby.

Even with the needed establishments available, there still was a lot of strain and serious barfights between the locals and those GIs with semenpaddy symptoms. Without some services it would have been unsustainable.

So when the U.S. military does not allow homosexual behavior, does not allow intergender relations between lots of male and few female troopers and now prohibits visiting prostitutes, the aggression will look for other ways out.

The higher command tries to pray away the problem by providing lots of, mostly radical christian, religious services. But when your troops are asked to pacify an area with people of different believes that wad goes off in the wrong direction too.

In one room, cupboards used to store the shoes of those attending prayers had what appeared to be Christian crosses scrawled on them. Other footage showed papers strewn on office floors and windows smashed.
U.S. troops raid Sunni clerics' Iraq office

From a plain operational perspective the new directive will lead directly to such incidents and does deny the political effectiveness of the troops in a the attempt to pacify.

That only, of course, if you really want to attempt to pacify.

Otherwise, the directive is even be effective to further the political aim.

Posted by b on January 8, 2006 at 04:11 PM | Permalink


I love that word. LOL.

but tell me, what's wrong with a Playboy and some private time?

someone has made and sold about 3000 lifelike dolls with skin you have to powder to take away the tackiness, (I read this online, REALLY). btw. they retail for about 6k.

I suppose if I want to do the patriotic thing, I should send my billmon doll to the troops...

Posted by: fauxreal | Jan 8, 2006 5:32:34 PM | 1

OMG! I am shocked!shocked!Say it isn't so!How can you so casually
pimp out your beloved billmon doll? The same doll that has given you
endless hours of bliss, that you have so carefully nurtured and pampered and patted on the back to burp? That you so lovingly (sic)
clad in swaddling clothes and also on special occasions clad in those
special gifts from Victoria's Secrets?(At no small expense, I might add)
The very image of this, this beloved toy being so carelessly thrown to the ground in front of so many slavering hamhanded thuggish dogfaces that would shurely put it through so many unmentionable perversions fills me with horror! Quel Horreur! The Horror! The Horror!
Alack and Alas, I have held you in high esteem. I deemed you a Madame,
but it seems that you are simly a Madam. I weep.

Snark is not dead,it simply mutates.HEEHEEHEE.

Posted by: possum | Jan 8, 2006 9:11:17 PM | 2


In WWI, the US army patently refused to take part in the system of organized Army-approved (and inspected) broththels for servicemen. As a result, venereal disease rates for Doughboys were much higher than those of their Allied counterparts.

Leave it to Bush to see that "abstinence only" spills over from the classroom to the barracks.

Posted by: ralphieboy | Jan 9, 2006 12:52:10 AM | 3


The Woman Who Slept with Men to Take the War out of Them

Posted by: Uncle $cam | Jan 9, 2006 1:52:12 AM | 4

'Struth! This errant posting, these comments, all of them, are so off-base, so, so . . . heathen. Secular. Jaded. Unbiblical. UnAmerican.

Verily, verily I say unto thee: all our King George is doing is seeing that we have only celibate Christian soldiers marching through this world on the wonderful morning when the Rapture comes. Yea, that Day of Days is nigh -- there can be no blue balls or syphilitic shivers in God's own regiments, no lads with weak backs and failing eyesight brought on by self-abuse, no cold sores or crabs in the command bunker. Just that old time religion, and the rigorous retention of our precious bodily fluids.

God save our brave King George, whose vision prepares this world for the Second Coming!

By the time we hit Iran this summer, he'll be anointing our troops in Crisco oil, dressing them in combat sandals and raiment of spotless white, with too-small body armor plates sewn therein. He'll march the flower of an American generation in celestial ranks across the deserts of the Holy Land, leaving unbelievers undone behind them.

Jesus H. Christ, it'll be glorious!

You can watch the whole cakewalk on the Situation Room on CNN, from the comfort of your sofa, for this is America, and you are free!

As for the lot of thee at MoA -- put down those keyboards and repent your snark, ye infidels and wastrels!

Stop stroking your QWERTY and grab your rosary beads. Woe unto thee lest ye repent now, and enlist in the King's Army!

Posted by: Antifa | Jan 9, 2006 2:41:30 AM | 5

It took me a while to get past that "semen paddy" thing not withstanding the laughs (& some pretty good ones at that),but, you got to wonder, if in a politically uncorrect way -- if in some ways the lack of intimacy with the (potential & otherwise) enemy does'nt somehow underline the whole failure of the enterprize. Its not as I myself (in other posts on this subject) have maintained that sex and other vice is a necessary device for the sanity of soldering -- for which upon reflection, I'm not so sure the military these days is particularlly interested in, givin the Vietnam experience. For sex, and more so, vice i.e.drugs, pretty much incapacitated the military in Vietnam for the last 5 or 6 years of that conflict (especially heroin). So it is with some risk, that the Iraqi conflict is predicated upon an untested and novel extream isolation from the host country -- to both prevent internal degeneration of the force itself and to circumvent any widespread sense or rumor of sexual exploitation of Iraqi women, as propaganda tool.This is pretty clear, that soldering is to be narrowed as an activity. Which puts the american troops inside their alien skin, inside their kevlar armor, inside their armored vehicles, inside their fortified bases in the position of being denied contact in every way imaginable,and also in the unprecidented position of not being able to fuck the enemy -- which in a primordial way is an even greater insult. Because if you ask yourself what greater insult could follow "fucking our women" it would be " to good -- to fuck our women". All of which pushes the american ability to make a cultural impact that communicates even the most remote (and rote) level of humanity is renderd mute -- and alien in the most elemental way. Essentially, the US troops are aliens, as if from outer space and eshewed to the extent of not being "people" not just in Anbar provence but everywhere. So a viscious cycle of alienation insues at both ends culmanating in absolute mistrust -- on both sides.

Posted by: anna missed | Jan 9, 2006 5:50:56 AM | 6

the meaning of the german term "Samenstau" is "congestion of semen" or "seminal congestion". i don't know how that would translate into vernacular english, as "Samenstau" is IMO not vernacular german.

a vernacular german term of approximate meaning would be "Notgeil", denoting a state of boing horny and in bad need of a fuck. i guess that an english speaker would say that such a person is "loaded" (?)

the order itself stries me as being a) propaganda for the homefront and b) motivated by religion-induced stupidity.

the order would be ineffective because since the dawn of history, wherever soldiers are present, whores prosper. and prostitution has its firm place in all muslim countries, contrary to what people in the west would think (hint: the report of prudery in muslim countries is a bit overrated and their sexual conduct misunderstood). second, it is not like american soldiers are not raping iraqi women right and left. there are enough reports of this in the web. third, rape as a traditional tool of war would be only of limited effectiveness, as in arab societies women are killed or banned for almost anything perceived as a slight to the honor of the family. bastards have little chance of survival in societies where everybody knows who his/her parents were for at least 5 generations.

if a "samenstau effect" is what is behind the order, they will probably buy it at the price of a decrease in troop morale if at all. never mind lots of people laughing at their expense.

Posted by: name | Jan 9, 2006 7:20:23 AM | 7

Why military dont uses bromide?

Posted by: curious | Jan 9, 2006 7:49:06 AM | 8

The Emotional Plague

Posted by: Uncle $cam | Jan 9, 2006 7:58:28 AM | 9

@name, ralphieboy - The German word is "Samenkoller"

Posted by: b | Jan 9, 2006 8:13:25 AM | 10

Hmmm. I suppose most other males here don't really care to remember that the prostitute population, both male and female, is the job category most likely to have: 1. chronic chemical dependency, and 2. a history of child molestation.
Encouraging the more mercenary male relatives and boyfriends of isolated young girls to train them to be rental toys for the shallow isn't where I'll ever put my money.
I would love it if the the male societies and college fraternities who engage in this hypocritical betrayal of "The War On Drugs" and "Family Values" were outed both collectively and individually.
Even in Amsterdam the brothels are staffed by desperate East European young women who had responded to employment ads placed by pimps.

Posted by: multisect | Jan 9, 2006 10:36:47 AM | 11

b- semenpaddy doesn't seem to be quite the word in American English. Paddy is a nickname for an Irish person or evokes an image (for me at least) of toads and lily pads.

Koller- cabin fever...or tantrum (rage)?

the slang among women I know for men who do something that seems incredibly stupid and/or led by their lower brain (ahem) functions is something like...another sad case of testosterone poisoning...

but no woman that I know actually BELIEVES in testosterone poisoning. do ppl actually believe in "semen tantrums?" sort of like the collorary of "hysteria" from a uterus in need of manipulation? (this was actually done in doctor's I guess doctors were the equivalent of gigolos back in the day...)

here's one bit on that...

Hysteria was thought to be a consequence of lack of sexual intercourse. For centuries hysteria was believed by many to lead to inflammation of the uterus, which necessitated the expulsion of fluids to prevent it from wandering away from its anatomical home and possibly suffocating the woman who housed it. Physicians ranging from Hippocrates to Freud believed they had to coax the wandering womb back to its proper place or size with "massage treatments." A description of such a treatment reads like a cross between a medical report and soft-core pornography. The Greek physician Galen (AD 129-c. 216) noted that:

Following the warmth of the remedies and arising from the touch of the genital organs required by the treatment, there followed twitchings...From that time on she was free of all the evil she felt.

..which led to this

With the arrival of steam as a power source, doctors could treat hysteria in the office using new devices developed for this purpose. These vibrators functioned as time and labor saving devices for the medical community by mitigating the onerous job of manual manipulation;

...and the pictures are really good at wiki. I especially like the 1910 advert that says "Vibration is life." But the medical illustration is priceless.

anyway, all to say that I have no doubt that stress relief is important in combat, and orgasm seems to be a great stress reliever. so why don't they supply soldiers with equipment for that purpose??

I guess if they can't provide body armor, they're not going to worry about sex toys.

btw, a guy I used to know who was from Turkey told his girlfriend (and me) that in his culture, females would maintain their (technical) virginity by having anal sex.

I wonder, tho, if "semenpaddy" is a real thing, or if it's not part of the self-selection of a volunteer army that would be more likely to engage in a bar fight, say, than someone who would not volunteer for military service...and how much the conditioning a soldier receives might have something to do with a propensity for bar addition to being isolated from significant others.

Chalmers Johnson also wrote that there was a problem in Japan with rapes by soldiers at the military base in Okinowa, I think it was.

but it's an interesting question...if combat, like running, causes increases in endorphins, when soldiers have down time, do they seek out some form of endorphin-releasing/creating activity...opiates mimic endorphins too and bind to their receptors in the brain is one way...but sex (does running or combat?) causes the release of oxycontin, too, which bonds ppl to one maybe it's also the need for intimacy that's non-hostile --that affirms life and love -- that soldiers need too.

they could also eat chocolate and chili peppers, I suppose...they both increase the body's production of endorphins. so does meditation, at least that's the story. so I guess in Bush's army, the answer is prayer to deliver us from semenpaddy.

Posted by: fauxreal | Jan 9, 2006 10:51:40 AM | 12

We train them to kill, we allow them to torture, but we don't let them screw? We promote freedom of trade but put a lid on a most basic swap of money for services? They want to stop the spread of Darwinism in the classroom but promote Social Darwinism in all aspects of economic life?

Posted by: ralphieboy | Jan 9, 2006 11:07:21 AM | 13

On the ground, no one will pay attention to such laws / rules. They may not even be communicated to troops, or be so in a wink-wink nudge-nudge way. (?)

I always wonder, are such rules:

--just sops to the Christian fundamentalists? Easy crumbs, tossed, here you go?

--a misguided part of efforts to stem ‘human trafficking’ - a big point with the US some time ago; criminalising the customer is a standard, respected idea (see Sweden, who has created havoc all over the North with its new anti-prostitute-client crack-down)

--yet another opportunity for introducing laws that on the surface appeal to moral principles, common sense, ‘what is right’, but which in fine create ambiguity and confusion; thus, traps, submission to authority, a tightening of the noose?

--pre-emptive PR: No, US soldiers do not f** poor foreign women?

Probably, it is a bit of all of the above. The only talking point that solicits serious nods or satisfied grins from everyone.... YES!

And it can’t be applied to mercenaries...those well paid bastards who have all the advantages.

Posted by: Noisette | Jan 9, 2006 1:02:55 PM | 14


I would be relieved if it were only a sop to the Christian fundamentalists, but this is not Ronald Reagan, who quickly abandoned his fundamentalist base as soon as he came to power.

They learned their lesson after that. Bush is truly and deeply beholden to these people.

Posted by: ralphieboy | Jan 9, 2006 2:21:51 PM | 15

Noisette wrote: "On the ground, no one will pay attention to such laws / rules. They may not even be communicated to troops, or be so in a wink-wink nudge-nudge way. (?)"

Oh, they communicate them and come down hard on offenders of these new rules for, say, a week. I was in Daegu, South Korea a year ago when they installed a similar policy. The American GI's were universally loathed; even by their non-military countrymen. I grew up as a military dependent and I can tell you that GI's don't need much excuse to behave poorly when they're in their own country, but when you put them in a host country (where somebody else presumably must pay for the breakage) they become nothing short of intolerable (there was a minimum of one story per week coming down from Seoul with the headline "Drunk American Serviceman Punches Cab Driver/Steals Car/Commits Offense".) Thankfully, since I have forgotten to get a haircut for the past fifteen years or so, none of the locals took me for a GI and never suddenly remembered that it was their second-cousin-four-times-removed's birthday and had to close down the bar when I walked in.

Anyway, when the new "zero tolerance for whoring" policy was enacted, they swore to come down very hard on the policy's offenders for the first week. They also conveniently changed the curfew for the enlisted men (usually midnight) to 9pm for that week. Since the servicemen could not leave the base they were stationed at during the time the MP's were patrolling looking for violations (usually midnight-2pm), the brass proudly announced after the first week that nobody was found to be in violation of the new rule, therefore it must be working, therefore they could relax their patrols. After one week, it was more than business-as-usual... the enlisted men made up for a lost week of carousing while the MP's were conveniently looking the other way and hassling the locals. Congratulations all around.

fauxreal wrote: "but no woman that I know actually BELIEVES in testosterone poisoning."

Many a high school-aged male is convinced that a hard-on is a gift from the Almighty that must be used or there will be divine retribution. Most males grow out of it. But your analogy of the "semen tantrum" to the silly doctrine of "wandering uterus" (hysteria) is not really one-to-one. A much closer female approximation for the biochemistry excuse for behaving poorly would be premenstrual syndrome. Women and men both go through addled, uncomfortable times, but in neither case should this be used as a "get out of jail free" card.

Posted by: Monolycus | Jan 9, 2006 2:31:44 PM | 16


"This is my weapon.
This is my gun.
One is for killing.
One is for fun."

So keep 'em frustrated...
and therefore more willing to use rape as a weapon of war?

Posted by: gylangirl | Jan 9, 2006 4:34:12 PM | 17

BTW, with the exception of a very few chemically disturbed women, PMS in most women means Pre-Menstrual Sanity, ie the ability to stop being a doormat/people pleaser/victim and instead express culturally-dismissed feelings of anger.

Posted by: gylangirl | Jan 9, 2006 4:42:39 PM | 18

Didn't some Greek fellow write a play about a similar topic? Lysistrata or something... :-)

Posted by: puffin | Jan 9, 2006 7:27:14 PM | 19

How about "cumstipation"?

I think the Greeks, Romans and Janissaries had the best solution--leave the women alone and keep it in the barracks. Yes, sir, Sgt. Turdblossom, sir!

@ Gylangirl: yes, yes to Pre-menstrual Sanity, and those aren't hot flashes, they're Power Surges.

Posted by: catlady | Jan 9, 2006 8:17:37 PM | 20

posted by catlady:

How about "cumstipation"?


Monolycus- I was focusing on the idea that females needed to have their uteruses massaged to get rid of congestion, not the aggression part of it. The thing is that at the time, it seems no one thought a "lady" had an orgasm...isn't that amazing? she had to go to the doctor to relieve her of uterine congestion.

...I suppose catlady would call that cuntstipation. (oh my goodness, wash my mouth out with soap!)

oh, I just looked back at these posts and I misspoke...oxytocin is the hormone that is associated with trust and bonding...and both males and females produce it (and it's in semen) --and it's the same hormone that helps women relax so that their milk lets down if they're anxious when starting to nurse.

oxycontin release...brrrrrr....that's the hillbilly heroin that Rush had his maid muling. Ugh. I have a vision of him in a man thong, crooning "Can't Get Enough of Your Love" --sounds like a USO tour to me. that'll cure those men of cumstipation.

Posted by: fauxreal | Jan 9, 2006 10:17:50 PM | 21

Oh, my fevered brain.

Posted by: beq | Jan 10, 2006 7:44:32 AM | 22

Okay, I donated my billmon doll to the local girl scout troop so that they can earn their sex education badges.

Not only that, but my nose is back to the grindstone, so I can't waste my time saying silly stuff online. In other words, it's okay for the adults to come out again.

Posted by: fauxreal | Jan 10, 2006 7:34:46 PM | 23

We discussed this idea over at Left Behinds, too.

I like the wordplay of cumstipation, but it doesn't really convey how annoying "semenpaddied" guys are. Constipation is a problem for oneself, whereas this other state is a problem for everyone who has to deal with these aggro jerks.

I've always called it "roid rage," which is what happens when steroids elevate testosterone levels. Not to get all serious, but it's a widely documented phenomenon, so, no, it's not a made-up problem like "female hysteria." It's a real thing. I think blueballing leads to a milder version.

Er, not that I've ever experienced it. Or masturbated. No sir, not me, your honor. She bop, he bop, but no me bop.

Posted by: Solomon Grundy | Jan 10, 2006 10:26:02 PM | 24

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